A: That's a great question, and one that has a variety of answers. I suppose to answer your question, I'd have to ask you a few questions myself.
1. Is he/she the primary or secondary source of income? For instance, until recently, my wife was
a Project Manager for Dell Computers. She was very good at what she did and very well paid.
However, her job was high-pressure and very stressful. She quit and went from a very
substantial salary to nothing...as in $0.00. She's beginning a career in Real Estate, but that
takes time and doesn't pay bills yet. It's caused some changes in our lifestyle. However, its
been easy for me to tell her how great she's doing, how great she's GOING to be and to
encourage her to hang in there, I'm rooting for her. As the main bread-winner, I'd do
whatever it takes to provide for my family. I've actually worked 2 or 3 jobs at one time
to provide. It's my job and my delight.
2. Is the problem one of lack of drive or laziness? If so, you can encourage them in what they
ARE doing while at the same time, building up their confidence to do more.
3. What are YOU doing? Are you helping out financially? If not, why not? It's difficult to
condemn your spouse for not being a good provider if you're not being a good helper. In
today's world it often takes two (or more) incomes to make things work. Even if you can't
contribute financially, you can cut costs at home and save money for your family. Everyone
can and should help.