IWANM....Neatness
Q: My husband is very neat and organized and I am not. I know my stuff everywhere bugs him, but that's how I've always been. What should we do?
A: First, let me say this is a very interestingly worded question. Let's look at a few telling terms.
"I know my stuff everywhere bugs him". This is your spouse. If you know something that you are doing really bugs your spouse, then the question is, why would you want to do it? If your goal is to create animosity and discord in your marriage, then keep up the good work. Sounds like you're being successful.
"I've always been that way". Apparently, this disclaimer makes everything OK. By this logic, if I've always been a nose-picker or verbally abusive or.....well, you fill in the blank...you get a pass. So much for marriage making you better.
"What should we do?" Here's the problem with that statement, I'm not talking to "we". I'm just talking to "you".
So, here's my answer to you...You need to decide whether you want to be messy or happy. Pick one. If you know something bugs your spouse, stop. This isn't rocket science. Why would you want to do anything that would harm your marriage? Pick up your socks.
One more thing I need to add. You asked, so I'm answering you. If your spouse had written and told me he's really neat and organized and it bugs his wife, I'd tell him to decide whether he wants to be neat or happy. I'd tell him to lighten up. Life's too short to be all puckered up all the time. But, he didn't ask. You did.
If you can find a compromise, that's really the key to a happy marriage. Most likely, one of you needs to loosen up and the other needs to pick up. Meet in the middle. That's where sanity lives.
A: First, let me say this is a very interestingly worded question. Let's look at a few telling terms.
"I know my stuff everywhere bugs him". This is your spouse. If you know something that you are doing really bugs your spouse, then the question is, why would you want to do it? If your goal is to create animosity and discord in your marriage, then keep up the good work. Sounds like you're being successful.
"I've always been that way". Apparently, this disclaimer makes everything OK. By this logic, if I've always been a nose-picker or verbally abusive or.....well, you fill in the blank...you get a pass. So much for marriage making you better.
"What should we do?" Here's the problem with that statement, I'm not talking to "we". I'm just talking to "you".
So, here's my answer to you...You need to decide whether you want to be messy or happy. Pick one. If you know something bugs your spouse, stop. This isn't rocket science. Why would you want to do anything that would harm your marriage? Pick up your socks.
One more thing I need to add. You asked, so I'm answering you. If your spouse had written and told me he's really neat and organized and it bugs his wife, I'd tell him to decide whether he wants to be neat or happy. I'd tell him to lighten up. Life's too short to be all puckered up all the time. But, he didn't ask. You did.
If you can find a compromise, that's really the key to a happy marriage. Most likely, one of you needs to loosen up and the other needs to pick up. Meet in the middle. That's where sanity lives.
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